Why did Jesus walk on water?
Because He had no shoes!
Why did Jesus drink wine?
Because it had turned into water.
Does God watch us all the time?
Only if we are paranoid.
Why did Jesus not wear grey flannel trousers?
Because he failed his interview at the Bank.
Why did Jesus carry a ladder?
So he could Ascend to heaven.
Why did Jesus have no credit cards?
He had enough already!