I was feeling a trifle excited
The meringues were all stuck to the plate
The jelly was yellow
The custard was mellow
And the cream was too thick to inflate.
I was feeling a tart in the market
I hardly knew which slice to bite.
My heart felt like sponge cake
With jam and cream in a lake
I’d a hard nut to crack in the night
The potatoes were smashed like my spelling
The chickpeas have tried to lay eggs
Yet the bacon was green
Unsmoked’s what I mean.
My larder is full of old nags